Sunday, July 31, 2005

Yo Soy El Nino, Little Bro

Thirty years ago today, my little brother was born. A few days after that, mom and dad brought him home from the hospital all swaddled and pink and fresh-new baby-smelling. I was a month and a half shy of my second birthday.

"Nabbalicious," my dad said, "this is your new brother."

I walked over and looked at his little face, and began to stroke his head. My parents exhaled and smiled in relief. "She likes him. No. She loves him. We're not going to have any of those problems with the two of them fighting. We have got it made."

That's when I hauled off and slapped him. Infuriated, Dad grabbed me by the arm and took me to my room to think about what I had done. I'm still thinking about it, and it makes me laugh. I'm sorry, I can't help it. It's just so crazy.

And it all goes downhill from there. A few weeks later, mom heard some yelling upstairs. She went into my brother's nursery and found me standing in the middle of the room screaming, "SHUT UUUP! SHUT UUUUUUP!!!" as he cried in his crib.

Through the years, he ratted me out for everything and I beat him up in return -- although I was frequently warned that one day he'd be bigger than me, and he would exact his revenge. "Yeah! You better look out!" he'd sneer. Um, yes, he towers over me now, and even though he could kill me, he has thankfully chosen not to. Or maybe he's just waiting for a good time. When mom's not looking.

Anyway, at some point, I started to notice: my brother is funny as shit. And I'm not just saying that so he won't beat me up. His "I know eeeeverything about the Titanic" bit kills every time, trust me. It has hand movements, even. He can do dead-on impressions of just about anyone.

So, I feel a bit bad that for so many years I was annoyed that he was my brother -- even going so far as to plant the seed in my mom's mind that he was switched at the hospital, because did nobody else think it was odd that he resembled no one in the family? I'm sure it was to mom's great relief that he started to resemble various relatives (including me) as he got older.

I'm pretty proud of him now. Happy Birthday, David!