Monday, February 28, 2005

You CAN Find True Love At 8, Kids

Fellow lip-gloss devotee Alyssa over at Big Red Blog invited me to expound on my most favoritest lip gloss. She has her own musings on her favorite up there today, as well, so go check it out!

Over the years, I have tried all manner of lip balms. It all started in my youth, when my grandma used to send my sister and I ginormous value packs of Bonne Bell lip gloss at Christmas. Cherry. Watermelon. Bubble Gum. But one flavor rose to the top and stood out above all of the others: the mighty Dr Pepper. The flavor? Delicious. The tint, just right for my not pale-not quite tan skin tone. The price, $1.09 at Target today, and perfect for loading up. The staying power? Pretty darn good. Moisturizing effects? It's downright soothing. It can't be beat.

In some of those years between that first lip-balm Christmas and now, I had doubted our love. Is it really possible that I found what I hadn't even been looking for at the tender age of 8? I wasn't ready to commit. Sure, Dr Pepper was great and all, and had all the qualities I was looking for in a lip balm, but I wanted to sow my wild oats for a few years and really find out if Dr Pepper was The One.

I heard about Kiehls' #1 (in the tub). Kiehl's was manna from heaven, from the sound of it, so I thought I'd give it a try. There was the initial rush -- I was using legendary lip balm! But the high faded fast. It has no tint, doesn't smell like anything special and is a little greasy. Meh.

Jasclo tried to set me up on a blind date with some lip balms inspired by snack foods: namely, Junior Mints and Sno-Balls. Junior Mints smelled chocolatey, but was lacking in the mint smell department. While it was a good date, it wasn't exactly as advertised. Sno-Balls is moody. Sometimes it smells like coconut. Sometimes it smells like cake. And we were always out of sync. When I wanted to smell coconut, Sno-Balls was all, "But I'm cake now!" We weren't feeling each other.

Four years ago, the kind of wisdom that comes with age was bestowed upon me. I looked up Dr Pepper to see how it was doing. Oh, it was doing great. Wanted the world over. I would go to Target to find it, and often, it wouldn't even be there. But...would it take me back? Would it forgive me my lip gloss infidelities? Dr Pepper was understanding. A little hurt, sure. We started up again slow. One tube, here and there. Gradually, I added more. And today, I am happy to report that there are no fewer than 12 tubes of Dr Pepper stationed around the house, in the car and in my desk at work.

It's an open relationship, though. Dr Pepper knows I'll never leave again, and is secure enough to allow me to experiment with other balms. Some of them are nice -- the A&W Root Beer flavor is a new favorite (there is no tint, however) -- but none of them have every single quality I am looking for on one balm except the magical Dr Pepper. We will never be apart again!